|Sometime people with depression require medical treatment|
Part 2: An Outpatient of the Psychiatric Hospital and the way to change his mind
In part 1, I talked about my disease progression from the beginning. In this section I will talk about my healing process in a hospital and how I have changed my mind.
|Strong medication maybe used|
When I recognized the signs of mental disturbance, I went to the Psychiatric Hospital for outpatient treatment with the typical depressants leading by Prozac, the strongest medicine of this type. After three rounds of treatment, I had a feeling of well being a
gain, happy and energetic again … But, it lasted only about 4 months, the illness with typical symptoms came back, burying me with the heavier condition! Sadly!
At that time, I was like other people with depression, often self-inflicted, embarrassed about themselves; the thought “life is really meaningless”, remains in the mind all the time; the feeling of desire for being a corpse came back from time to time.
|There are many recovery centers for people with severe depression|
Dark despair associating with the illness aggravates the disease … Severe illness makes the mood more pessimistic, and so on … What a vicious circle and an extreme deadlock!
One day, walking in the nature, I noticed the hints to find a cure for depression for myself:
Getting “the pulse” of disease:
1. People who are struggling with depression most likely have experienced a shock, such as divorce, bankruptcy, separation, death, severe slander, and so on!
2. Depressed people more likely belong to type of people whose right hemisphere of brain is more active; they tend to be symbol-oriented, sensitive, sentimental; it is quite difficult for them to act with logical reasoning, calculating, clear cost and benefit analysis; they likely characterize with artist spirit and potential for art .
3. People with depression likely characterize with sensitive autonomic nervous system, or have a history of excessive sensitivity, or were overwhelmed by shocks such as fainting, panic caused by heartbreaking scene or death.
4. People with depression more likely belong to type of people who tend to tie themselves up to steady principles or regulations, tend to have excessive self-discipline, excessive self-awareness; it is easy to see, most likely they are perfectionist in everything.
5- People with depression are those who tend to have low blood pressure, lead to hypotension … which increases the impact of depressive symptoms and vice versa.
These two syndromes: Excessive stress and low blood pressure silently interact with each other, pushing their physical and psychological status to worse level of illness with shaking pains due to repeatedly muscle contraction of the underlying contractions, with high susceptibility to colds, shortness of breath, at-night sleepless, night-mares resulting in drowsiness in the morning… and all the bothering symptoms are raging without end.
After thoroughly analysis of my own underlying illness, I realize that “depression” is essentially a “mental illness” – that means the illness which come from one’s mind; mental illness associates with specific conditions of patients and results in chaotic disorders of both body and mind.
Start new treatment course
When I have got a clear idea about the source of my mental health downfall, I understand that, to get rid of it I must start from the mind – I must stabilize my mind, keep it calm and peaceful. So I came to conclusion and took the following decisions:
a) Stop using medicines, do not take Prozac according to the doctor anymore (it is just a neuromuscular blocker).
b) Take antihypertensive drugs (Arcalion), to heighten blood pressure from a long lasted level of 90/58 to a stable higher level of 100/70, and combine it with moderate exercise and dietary choices.
c) To read the book on introspective psychology of Buddhism, it’s the best to read such authors as Thich Nhat Hanh, Dalai Lama, Krisnarmuti, Osho. In particular, I was convinced by the insights of Albert Einstein the mathematician on introspective psychology, the inner opening of Buddhist philosophy, and so on. From that I opened the senses, the mind that I have perceived before, but in ambiguous manners, not fully aware of what the mind is saying about myself.
d) I learn to discharge my “Me-ism” or my “Ego” as more as possible; stop being too strict, lessen expectation and be more tolerant for myself; I love myself more.
(To be continued with final part 3)